Gee Whiz

Stop the presses. Hold onto your hats. Call your grandmother. UC Davis Health has dropped an absolute bombshell in their article, “Social Media’s Impact on Our Mental Health and Tips to Use It Safely.” And what, pray tell, is this groundbreaking discovery? Social media might not be all sunshine and serotonin for your mental health. Gasp. I know. I’ll give you a moment to recover.

In a move reminiscent of scientists confirming that water is, in fact, wet, the article lays bare the utterly shocking truth: spending too much time scrolling through a highlight reel of everyone else’s (likely exaggerated) perfect lives can make you feel bad. Who knew?

The article helpfully explains how “the constant barrage of curated images and posts can lead to unrealistic comparisons,” adding that this can contribute to anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. This is news to no one except, perhaps, your Great Aunt Mildred, who’s still trying to figure out how to turn on her iPhone. For the rest of us, it’s just confirmation of what we’ve long suspected every time we’ve stared at our screens feeling inexplicably terrible after looking at Becky’s tropical vacation pictures.

But it’s not all doom and gloom. The article kindly offers tips for using social media safely, which boil down to classics like: take breaks, curate your feed, and remember that influencers are just regular people with better lighting. Earth-shattering advice, right? It’s like being told to eat vegetables and get eight hours of sleep—solid recommendations that nobody will actually follow.

Reading this piece, I couldn’t help but laugh at how neatly it packages the obvious. Yes, social media can be bad for you if you binge it like Netflix on a sick day. Yes, scrolling past a parade of influencers flaunting their curated perfection can mess with your self-esteem. This is akin to saying, “Eating an entire cheesecake in one sitting might not align with your fitness goals.” Duh.

And yet, here we all are, collectively ingesting the mental equivalent of Doritos, and then wondering why we feel awful. “Too much screen time can disrupt sleep,” the article warns. Really? You’re telling me my 2 a.m. TikTok binge isn’t doing wonders for my circadian rhythm? Color me shocked.

One particularly insightful nugget from the article is this: “Social media is designed to be addictive.” Oh, really? I hadn’t noticed. Not when Instagram bombards me with notifications like, “You haven’t seen what your second cousin’s dog walker posted today!” or when TikTok’s infinite scroll feels like staring into a black hole of dance trends and oddly satisfying cake-decorating videos. It’s like being handed a bowl of candy and told, “Don’t eat it all at once.” Sure, Jan.

The article wisely advises setting boundaries, like time limits on apps, to combat this addiction. Solid advice, but let’s be honest: we’ve all tried that and failed miserably. My phone once politely reminded me to stop using Instagram for the day, and I swiped it away like an annoying fly, immediately diving back into the abyss of memes and cat videos.

The truth is, we already know social media can be harmful, but we can’t resist the siren call of likes, comments, and the occasional dose of validation. It’s like knowing that touching a hot stove will burn you but doing it anyway because, for a split second, it felt warm and comforting.

So, while the UC Davis article might not win any awards for breaking new ground, it’s a gentle nudge—a reminder to step back, breathe, and maybe touch some grass. Not exactly revolutionary, but hey, sometimes the obvious bears repeating.

Want to read it yourself? Check out the full article here. Just don’t forget to put your phone down afterward.