In this episode of The Demons Within Podcast, Greg and Job Pete discuss one of the importance of routine when rebuilding your life after struggles with mental illness, alcoholism, or addiction.
An effective routine can help reduce stress, which can lead to better mental health, more time to relax and less anxiety
Alcoholism is a complex disease that affects millions of people around the world. It is a chronic condition that requires ongoing treatment and support to overcome. Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) is a well-known and widely used program that has helped many people who struggle with alcohol addiction. In this essay, we will explore why AA works for people that struggle with alcohol, with a focus on the role of sponsors and the 12 steps of AA.
One of the primary reasons why AA works for people struggling with alcohol is the sense of community and support it provides. AA meetings bring together people who share a common struggle, and this shared experience creates a sense of belonging and understanding. This can be particularly important for individuals who feel isolated or ashamed of their addiction. Being surrounded by others who have gone through similar experiences can provide a sense of hope and motivation to overcome alcoholism.
Another key aspect of AA is the concept of sponsorship. Sponsors are individuals who have been sober for a significant amount of time and serve as mentors and guides for those who are new to AA. They provide support, advice, and encouragement throughout the recovery process. Having a sponsor can be incredibly beneficial for individuals struggling with alcohol addiction, as it provides a sense of accountability and someone to turn to during difficult times.
The 12 steps of AA are also a fundamental part of the
program and are designed to guide individuals through the recovery process. The
steps are as follows:
We admitted we were powerless over alcohol – that our lives
had become unmanageable.
Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could
restore us to sanity.
Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the
care of God as we understood Him.
Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being
the exact nature of our wrongs.
Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of
character.
Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing
to make amends to them all.
Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except
when to do so would injure them or others.
Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong
promptly admitted it.
Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our
conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of
His will for us and the power to carry that out.
Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these
steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics and to practice these
principles in all our affairs.
The 12 steps provide a framework for individuals to identify and address the underlying causes of their addiction, as well as to develop a spiritual foundation for their recovery. The first step, admitting powerlessness over alcohol, is often the hardest for individuals struggling with addiction, but it is a necessary step to begin the process of recovery. The steps that follow guide individuals through a process of self-reflection, making amends for past wrongs, and developing a sense of purpose and meaning in their lives.
One of the strengths of the 12 steps is that they can be adapted to fit the needs and beliefs of individuals from all walks of life. While the steps mention God, they do not prescribe a specific religious belief system. Instead, individuals are encouraged to develop their own understanding of a higher power or spiritual force that can guide them through their recovery.
In addition to the 12 steps, AA meetings also provide a
space for individuals to share their experiences and offer support to one
another. Meetings are often structured around a specific topic or theme, and individuals
are given the opportunity to share their thoughts and feelings on the topic.
This can be particularly helpful.
Mill P
Jealousy is a common emotion that can arise in various situations, such as in relationships, at work, or in social situations. It is a feeling of envy or resentment towards someone who possesses something that we desire, or who we perceive as having an advantage over us. While it is a normal human emotion, it can become problematic if it begins to interfere with our relationships or our overall well-being. In this essay, we will explore how to handle jealousy and how to cultivate a more spiritual mindset to promote inner peace and happiness.
To handle jealousy, it is important to first recognize and acknowledge the feeling. It can be tempting to ignore or suppress jealousy, but this can often make it worse in the long run. By acknowledging jealousy, we can begin to understand where it is coming from and how it is impacting us. This self-awareness can help us take steps to manage and overcome jealousy.
One way to manage jealousy is to practice gratitude. Instead of focusing on what we do not have, we can focus on what we do have and be grateful for it. By cultivating a sense of gratitude, we can shift our focus from what others have to what we have, which can help us feel more content and satisfied with our lives. We can also practice empathy and try to understand the perspective of the person we are jealous of. This can help us see things from a different point of view and reduce feelings of envy or resentment.
Another way to handle jealousy is to practice self-compassion. It is important to remember that we are all human and that we all have strengths and weaknesses. Instead of being critical or judgmental towards ourselves, we can practice self-compassion by treating ourselves with kindness, understanding, and forgiveness. This can help us develop a more positive self-image and reduce feelings of jealousy towards others.
Furthermore, to handle jealousy, we can practice mindfulness. Mindfulness involves being present in the moment, without judgment or distraction. By practicing mindfulness, we can become more aware of our thoughts and emotions, including jealousy, without getting caught up in them. This can help us develop a more objective perspective and reduce the intensity of our jealous feelings.
To cultivate a more spiritual mindset, it is important to develop a sense of inner peace and contentment. This can be achieved through various spiritual practices, such as meditation, prayer, or yoga. These practices can help us connect with our inner selves and with something greater than ourselves, whether that be a higher power, the universe, or simply our own inner wisdom.
Meditation is a powerful tool for cultivating inner peace and spiritual awareness. It involves focusing on the breath or a mantra and letting go of distracting thoughts and emotions. By practicing meditation regularly, we can develop a greater sense of calm and clarity, which can help us manage stress, anxiety, and other negative emotions. We can also use meditation to cultivate a sense of compassion and love towards ourselves and others.
Prayer is another spiritual practice that can help us connect with a higher power or divine energy. It can provide us with comfort, guidance, and a sense of purpose and meaning. Prayer can be done in various ways, such as through reciting traditional prayers, writing our own prayers, or simply speaking from the heart.
Yoga is a physical and spiritual practice that combines movement, breath, and mindfulness. It can help us develop strength, flexibility, and balance, both physically and mentally. Through yoga, we can connect with our bodies and our breath, and develop a sense of inner peace and contentment.
In addition to these spiritual practices, it is important to
cultivate a sense of gratitude and service. Gratitude involves acknowledging
and appreciating the blessings in our lives, both big and small. By focusing on
what we are grateful for, we can develop a more positive and optimistic outlook
on life.
Mill P
In this episode of The Demons Within Podcast, Greg and Job Pete discuss the nature of ego-based romantic relationships. They touch on their past relationship struggles - both romantic and general interpersonal relationship.
Meditation has been shown to be a powerful tool for individuals who are in recovery from alcoholism and addiction. It can help individuals manage cravings, reduce stress and anxiety, increase self-awareness, and promote overall well-being. In this essay, we will explore the ways in which meditation can support those in recovery from addiction and alcoholism.
Firstly, meditation can help manage cravings. During the recovery process, individuals can experience intense cravings for drugs or alcohol. These cravings can be triggered by various environmental and emotional factors. Meditation provides individuals with a way to become more aware of their thoughts and emotions, allowing them to identify triggers that may lead to cravings. By recognizing these triggers, individuals can take steps to avoid them or deal with them in a more constructive way.
Moreover, meditation can reduce stress and anxiety. When individuals are in recovery, they may experience high levels of stress and anxiety due to the many challenges they face. These challenges can include rebuilding relationships, finding new employment, and managing financial and legal issues. Meditation can help individuals cope with these challenges by promoting a sense of calm and relaxation. Studies have shown that regular meditation can reduce the production of stress hormones such as cortisol, which can help individuals feel more relaxed and less anxious.
In addition, meditation can increase self-awareness. Self-awareness is a key component of the recovery process as it allows individuals to identify negative thought patterns and behaviors that may have contributed to their addiction. Meditation can help individuals become more aware of their thoughts, feelings, and emotions, allowing them to identify patterns that may be detrimental to their recovery. By becoming more self-aware, individuals can take steps to change these patterns and develop healthier habits.
Furthermore, meditation can promote overall well-being. Addiction and alcoholism can take a toll on an individual’s physical, emotional, and mental health. Meditation can help individuals improve their overall well-being by promoting better sleep, reducing blood pressure, and improving immune function. In addition, meditation can help individuals develop a more positive outlook on life, which can be beneficial for their mental and emotional health.
It is important to note that meditation is not a replacement for traditional addiction treatment. Rather, it is a complementary therapy that can enhance the effectiveness of other treatments. In fact, many addiction treatment programs incorporate meditation into their programs as part of a holistic approach to recovery.
There are various forms of meditation that can be beneficial for those in recovery. Mindfulness meditation, which involves focusing on the present moment without judgment, has been shown to be effective in reducing stress, anxiety, and depression. Loving-kindness meditation, which involves sending positive thoughts and feelings to oneself and others, can help individuals develop more compassion and empathy. Transcendental meditation, which involves repeating a mantra, can help individuals achieve a deep state of relaxation and reduce stress.
In order to benefit from meditation, it is important to practice regularly. Even just a few minutes of meditation each day can be beneficial. It can be helpful to find a quiet place to meditate, free from distractions. Some individuals may find it helpful to use guided meditations, which can be found online or through meditation apps. These guided meditations can provide individuals with instruction and support as they begin their meditation practice.
In addition to formal meditation practice, individuals in recovery can incorporate mindfulness into their daily activities. Mindfulness involves bringing awareness to one’s thoughts, feelings, and surroundings in the present moment. This can be done while engaging in everyday activities such as eating, walking, or washing dishes. By practicing mindfulness, individuals can develop a greater sense of awareness and presence in their daily lives.
In conclusion, meditation can be a powerful tool for those
in recovery from addiction and alcoholism. It can help individuals manage
cravings, reduce stress and anxiety, increase self-awareness, and promote
overall well-being. It is important
Mill P
“I had so much anger. I had so many irrational
resentments. And as most of us learned, anger is a particularly brutal aspect
of the alcoholic mind. It’s a defensive mechanism that can instantly be turned
into an offensive weapon. The anger is like a powerful rifle with a bayonet,
where you’re picking people off from afar with resentful ruminations, then
stabbing them with hurtful rage when they try to get too close to you.”
-Demons Within
In the realm of mental illness and addiction recovery, the
journey toward healing and growth is often hindered by unresolved anger and
lingering resentment. These negative emotions can act as formidable roadblocks,
preventing individuals from fully embracing a life of sobriety and serenity. As
Russell Brand aptly said, "Resentment is like drinking poison and waiting
for the other person to die." In this article, I will explore the problems
associated with holding onto anger and resentment, with a particular focus on
their impact on individuals recovering from alcoholism
To be clear, not everyone has an “anger problem”… but anger
is a problem for everyone. We all cause ourselves harm through it. We
drive people away. We act unreasonably. We say things we regret. We shave
minutes off our life—or in some cases, put ourselves in outright danger.
Anger is a natural emotion that arises in response to
perceived injustices, hurts, or betrayals. However, when anger festers and
transforms into deep-rooted resentment, it becomes a destructive force. The act
of holding onto resentment is akin to carrying a heavy burden that weighs us
down mentally, emotionally, and even physically. Instead of finding peace and
resolution, we remain trapped in a cycle of bitterness and negativity, which
hinders our personal growth and recovery.
When it comes to recovery from afflictions of the mind and
spirit, anger and resentment is pure poison. Alcoholism recovery demands
self-reflection, acceptance, and a willingness to let go of past grievances.
However, when individuals in recovery harbor anger and resentment, it hampers
their ability to heal and move forward. Resentment often keeps us tethered to
the past, preventing us from fully embracing the present and building a
healthier future. In the context of alcoholism, holding onto anger and resentment
can trigger relapses, as individuals seek solace or escape from their emotional
pain in alcohol.
Anger and resentment act as triggers, reawakening the
familiar desire to numb emotional pain through substance abuse. Individuals in
recovery often face numerous challenges, and unresolved anger can magnify those
challenges, making sobriety feel increasingly difficult. Bottling up these
negative emotions instead of addressing them only fuels the fire, leading to a
heightened risk of relapse. Breaking free from addiction requires a holistic
approach that encompasses healing the mind, body, and soul, including
addressing and resolving anger and resentment.
To overcome the perils of anger and resentment, individuals
in recovery must learn to embrace forgiveness and healing. Forgiveness is not
about condoning harmful actions or forgetting the pain inflicted upon us. It is
a conscious choice to release the negative emotions that hold us hostage and
hinder our recovery journey. By forgiving others and, equally important,
forgiving ourselves, we unlock the door to personal growth, self-compassion,
and a newfound sense of freedom.
Various therapeutic techniques can assist individuals in
releasing anger and resentment. These may include counseling, support groups,
meditation, journaling, and engaging in healthy coping mechanisms. It is
crucial to find a safe and supportive environment where one can openly express
and process these emotions, gaining valuable insights and perspectives from
others who have walked a similar path.
Letting go of anger and resentment is an ongoing process,
requiring commitment and self-reflection. It may not happen overnight, and
setbacks are to be expected. However, as individuals in recovery gradually shed
the weight of these negative emotions, they will discover newfound strength and
resilience. By redirecting their energy toward positive pursuits, nurturing
healthy relationships, and embracing personal growth, they can pave the way for
a life of serenity and lasting sobriety.
Anger and resentment are formidable roadblocks on the path
to recovery from alcoholism. As Russell Brand wisely noted, holding onto these
negative emotions is akin to self-inflicted harm. To truly break free from the
chains of addiction, individuals in recovery must confront and release their
anger and resentment.
Mill P
In this episode of The Demons Within Podcast, Greg and Job Pete discuss one of the ruling emotions of the world: Fear.
Fear is one of the most basic human emotions. It is programmed into the nervous system and works like an instinct. From the time we're infants, we are equipped with the survival instincts necessary to respond with fear when we sense danger or feel unsafe.
In this episode of The Mill P Writes Newshour with Greg Miller, Newsman Greg shares his experience with a violent pineapple. He also looks at new research that sheds some light on drinking during the pandemic.
“This type of surrender requires strength and courage. It
means to trust in a higher power, to relinquish self-will. Running on self-will
has only gotten you to this very park bench today. Surrender is about letting
go of pride, letting go of the ego, and letting go of whatever is preventing
you from asking for help. Surrender means to let go of worldly attachments.”
-Demons Within
At this point, it should go without saying that alcoholism, addiction, and mental health disorders can be
debilitating conditions that affect millions of individuals worldwide. Still...I just said it. And while
the road to recovery may seem daunting, the concept of surrender offers a
transformative approach to healing. This essay explores the importance of
surrender in achieving successful recovery, drawing insights from Buddhist
teachings. By relinquishing control, embracing vulnerability, and cultivating
mindfulness, individuals can unlock the power of surrender, leading to profound
personal growth and lasting healing.
Alcoholism, addiction, and mental health disorders are
complex conditions that can consume an individual's life. They often arise from
deep-rooted emotional pain, trauma, or unresolved issues. At their core, these
conditions involve a struggle for control—an attempt to numb or escape from
internal distress. However, this very struggle perpetuates the cycle of
suffering, leading individuals further down a path of self-destruction.
Surrender, as taught in Buddhist philosophy, is not an act
of weakness but rather a courageous acknowledgment of the limitations of the
ego. It involves relinquishing the illusion of control and opening oneself to
the present moment. In the context of recovery, surrender entails accepting the
reality of one's condition, acknowledging the need for help, and embracing
vulnerability.
In alcoholism, addiction, and mental health disorders, the
desperate desire for control becomes a significant obstacle to recovery. By
surrendering control, individuals recognize that their attempts to manage their
conditions have proven ineffective. They surrender their attachment to outcomes
and allow the healing process to unfold naturally. Surrendering control invites
a shift in perspective, empowering individuals to seek support from
professionals, engage in therapy, and adopt evidence-based treatments. It is
through this surrender that true healing can begin.
Buddhist teachings emphasize the power of vulnerability and
the strength found in embracing it. In the context of recovery, surrender
involves opening oneself up to the experience of emotional pain and discomfort.
By acknowledging vulnerability, individuals create space for healing and
self-compassion. They allow themselves to confront the root causes of their
conditions, often uncovering deeply buried emotions or past traumas. Embracing
vulnerability can be challenging, as it requires individuals to step outside
their comfort zones. However, it is through this openness that true
transformation and growth occur.
Buddhist teachings also place great importance on mindfulness—the
practice of non-judgmental awareness of the present moment. In the context of
recovery, cultivating mindfulness allows individuals to observe their thoughts,
emotions, and cravings without judgment. By developing this awareness,
individuals become better equipped to navigate triggers, manage cravings, and
make conscious choices that support their recovery journey. Mindfulness also
facilitates self-reflection, helping individuals gain insight into the patterns
and behaviors that perpetuate their conditions.
Achieving successful recovery from alcoholism, addiction,
and mental health disorders requires a profound shift in perspective—one that
embraces surrender as a transformative force. By surrendering control,
embracing vulnerability, and cultivating mindfulness, individuals embark on a
path of self-discovery and healing. Buddhist teachings offer valuable insights
into the power of surrender, reminding us that surrender is not a sign of weakness,
but rather a courageous act of acknowledging our limitations and embracing the
wisdom of the present moment. Surrender paves the way for a successful
recovery, leading individuals to liberation, peace, and the fulfillment of
their highest potential.
Mill P
Demons Within Podcast Episode 4 is out now! In this episode, Greg and Job Pete discuss dogs and pets, and how they can have a monumentally positive impact on mental health! Tune in! Because yes....it is awesome and cute stuff.
Shocker....I am talking about the EGO today! Real unknown territory...right?
Wrong.
Humility, pride, and the ego are complex aspects of human psychology that profoundly influence our lives. In the context of recovery from alcoholism and addiction, these psychological elements play a significant role in hindering or facilitating the journey towards healing and transformation. Drawing upon the teachings of renowned spiritual authors Eckhart Tolle and Michael A. Singer, this essay explores the interplay between humility, pride, the ego, and their impact on recovery processes.
I. Understanding Humility:
Humility is often misunderstood as a sign of weakness or lack of self-confidence. However, according to Tolle, humility is a state of being grounded in the present moment, free from the need to assert one's superiority or seek validation from external sources. Humility entails an authentic recognition of our interconnectedness with all life and a sense of awe and reverence for existence.
Humility in recovery is vital as it allows individuals to acknowledge their limitations, admit their struggles, and seek help. It fosters a willingness to learn, grow, and accept guidance from others who have successfully walked the path of recovery before them. By embracing humility, individuals open themselves up to the transformative power of vulnerability and create space for healing.
II. The Pitfalls of Pride:
Pride, on the other hand, is rooted in the ego's need for recognition, superiority, and control. It manifests as an inflated sense of self-importance, a reluctance to admit weakness or ask for help, and a resistance to surrendering to a higher power or a support network. Pride creates a barrier between individuals and their path to recovery, hindering self-reflection and impeding progress.
Singer emphasizes that pride reinforces the illusion of separateness, perpetuating the belief that we are isolated beings with no connection to the world around us. This false sense of self leads to an identification with our addictions, reinforcing destructive behaviors and obstructing the recovery journey.
III. The Ego's Role in Addiction:
The ego, as described by both Tolle and Singer, is the illusory construct of our identity based on past experiences, thoughts, and beliefs. In the context of addiction, the ego often drives individuals to seek temporary relief or escape from inner pain, trauma, or unresolved emotional issues. The ego becomes attached to the addictive substances or behaviors, reinforcing the false belief that they are necessary for survival or fulfillment.
The ego's relentless pursuit of pleasure, control, and avoidance of discomfort perpetuates the vicious cycle of addiction. It resists surrendering to the reality of one's condition, clings to denial, and fuels cravings and relapses. Recovery from addiction requires a shift in consciousness that transcends the ego's limited perspective and opens the door to profound transformation.
IV. Overcoming Roadblocks: The Path of Surrender and Presence:
Both Tolle and Singer emphasize the importance of surrender and presence in the recovery process. Surrender involves relinquishing the ego's grip on control and acknowledging that one's addictive patterns are unsustainable and self-destructive. It requires embracing humility, admitting powerlessness over the addiction, and seeking support from a higher power, a support group, or a mentor.
Presence, as Tolle explains, is the state of conscious awareness in the present moment. It entails disidentifying from the incessant chatter of the ego, observing thoughts and emotions without judgment, and cultivating a deep connection with the essence of who we truly are beyond our addictive tendencies. By cultivating presence, individuals in recovery can better understand the underlying causes of their addiction, confront unresolved emotions, and develop healthier coping mechanisms.
V. The Role of Humility in Recovery:
Humility is a crucial antidote to pride and ego-driven behaviors in recovery. It involves acknowledging that one's addiction is not a moral failing but a disease that requires treatment and ongoing self-reflection. Humility helps individuals let go of the need for external validation and instead focus on internal growth, self-compassion, and personal responsibility. It allows them to embrace the support of a community, learn from others' experiences, and foster a sense of interconnectedness.
So, I hope this essay was able to illustrate how humility, pride, and the ego are powerful psychological
forces that profoundly impact the recovery journey from alcoholism and
addiction. By recognizing the importance of humility, individuals in recovery
can shed the shackles of pride and ego, and embrace surrender, presence, and a
deeper connection to themselves and the world around them. Drawing upon the
teachings of Eckhart Tolle and Michael A. Singer, individuals can navigate the
roadblocks of their addiction, embark on a transformative path, and reclaim
their lives with newfound humility and self-awareness.
Mill P
In this episode of The Mill P Writes Newshour with Greg Miller, Newsman Greg has a Very Special Report. He also discusses an article that has a lot of statistics and stuff. AND, he looks at new research on mental health and romantic relationships.
“Expectations are premediated resentments. If we have a
set of expectations for an event, reaction, or response, and it doesn’t happen
the way we envision, think or expect, we will most likely become disappointed.
And worse, we become resentful.”
-Demons Within, Manny
Nothing creates more unhappiness than failed expectations.
The job promotion that doesn’t come to fruition, the relationship that doesn’t
end in marriage, the image of an ideal family that never materializes.
And that is because expectations are an attempt to control the future.
There is a fine line between expectations and legitimate
hopes and dreams. Having absolutely no expectations is a familiar way of saying
that life is empty and without hope or meaning. And that is not the goal. It is
more like an openness in which anything can happen and be welcomed.
You must try to be more centered. When you are centered spiritually
and emotionally, you aren’t so dependent on your circumstances. The normal,
everyday ups and downs of life don’t throw you off as easily.
You shouldn’t dictate in advance what a good day would be.
You can never truly see the big picture, so you need to leave room open for the
unexpected. When you do this, and when the unexpected inevitably occurs, it
upsets nothing in your day.
Practice outcome independence, or just let go of outcomes
all together. The only thing that any of us can truly control is our own
actions, and the vast majority of external outcomes are beyond our control.
Stop taking things so personal. Almost every mentor or
advisor will tell you that not taking things personally is a huge achievement
when you can genuinely reach that level of mental fortitude. It’s one of the Four
Agreements in Don Miguel Ruiz’s popular book on how to live life. When it
comes down to it, life comes and goes, and the Universe gives and takes away.
If you can nurture these attitudes, it will help you not
build up so many expectations. Our minds are stocked with images and ideas that
we identify with happiness. And by expecting those things, we expose ourselves
to letdowns, disappointments, and eventually resentments.
Your soul doesn’t exist to fill an arbitrary list in your psyche that was constructed in the past. The soul’s gifts are unexpected, and the happiness they bring is fresh because it comes from outside the confines of man-made expectations.
It can be very detrimental to have any expectations in a
recovery program. Every person's expectations are different and the pressure of
fulfilling them for oneself or another can be a great strain.
One day at a time is not only a wonderful, simple slogan
that not only 12 step recovery programs adhere to, but also, people being
people in everyday life realize that taking one day at a time is the only way
to go. So try to leave your expectations in the closet, in a box deep in a back
corner. It will be healthier for all involved.
Here are some quick bullet points on why expectations can be harmful:
- Disappointment: When we have high expectations, there is a greater chance of experiencing disappointment if reality does not meet those expectations. This can lead to frustration, sadness, and a negative impact on our emotional well-being.
- Stress and Pressure: Expectations can create unnecessary stress and pressure. We may feel the need to live up to certain standards or meet specific outcomes, even if they are unrealistic or beyond our control. This can result in anxiety, self-doubt, and a constant feeling of being overwhelmed.
- Strained Relationships: Expectations can strain relationships, both personal and professional. When we have expectations of how others should behave or what they should do, it can lead to conflicts and misunderstandings. People may feel judged or not accepted for who they are, which can damage trust and connection.
- Limited Perspectives: Expectations can limit our perspectives and narrow our focus. We may become fixated on a particular outcome or path, ignoring alternative possibilities or opportunities. This restricts our ability to adapt, learn, and grow from unexpected experiences.
- Self-Imposed Restrictions: Expectations can impose self-imposed restrictions on ourselves. We may limit our own potential by adhering strictly to what we believe is expected of us, rather than exploring our true passions and interests. This can hinder personal growth and lead to a sense of unfulfillment.
- Comparison and Insecurity: Expectations often arise from societal or cultural norms, which can lead to constant comparison with others. When we compare ourselves to others and feel inadequate, it can fuel feelings of insecurity and lower self-esteem.
It is important to acknowledge that having goals and
aspirations is not inherently harmful. However, it is essential to approach
them with flexibility, open-mindedness, and self-compassion. By managing our
expectations and focusing on the process rather than just the outcomes, we can
reduce the potential harm they can cause.
So...stop expecting stuff and just go DO stuff.
Mill P
“We are notorious for ‘running’ around self-righteously
declaring our rights to this and to that. But if we were to reflect upon the
millions who ‘ran’ across bloodied battlefields so that we would have rights to
declare, I think we’d do a whole lot less declaring and a whole more
appreciating.”
― Craig D. Lounsbrough
So just like Memorial Day, I fuckin’ LOVE the 4th
of July. But again, like Memorial Day, I want to bring some light to the
potentially darker sides of this beautiful holiday.
While for some, Fourth of July celebrations can be a time of
excitement, excess, and fun, for others it’s a trigger for an underlying mental
health issue. With eating and drinking being the focus at the majority of these
parties, those who are susceptible to addictive behaviors may find it difficult
to take part without consequence. If you find that the pressure to eat or drink
excessively has left you feeling out of control, consider the following five
tips:
Open up to Family or Friends: If you feel comfortable doing
so, let your friends and family know ahead of time what you’re going through.
Opening up about substance use or disordered eating problems can help prevent a
lot of awkward and unnecessary interactions, and it can make it easier for you
to stay true to your path of recovery.
Make a Plan, and a Back-up Plan: Structure is important when
you’re recovering from an addiction. The unknown can present unforeseen
obstacles so make sure you have enough information about the celebration to
know what you’re walking into, or who. If you know that the hotdogs and
hamburgers offered will quite possibly be a trigger, stick to your own routine.
Eat a meal you’re comfortable with beforehand and bring a cooler with some
snacks that will keep you energized throughout the night. If you’re worried
about people offering you a drink, have a cup with you filled with water, soda,
or another beverage so you can easily deflect and let them know you’re already
all set.
Focus on Celebrating What Really Matters: Too often we
follow a pattern of behavior without much thought. Why do we celebrate the
independence of our country by guzzling beer and grilling food? Focus on your
sobriety or your recovery. Those things are truly worth celebrating and if
you’re not in the mood for a party, have your family take a hike or spend the
day swimming at the beach. There’s no one way to celebrate, and creating your
own healthy traditions may make this your best 4th of July yet.
Have a Set Time that You’ll Leave: Most celebrations get
more out of hand the longer they run, so enjoy your time but set a reasonable
time for departure. It’ll also help you to avoid traffic and the traffic
accidents which are a common occurrence on this holiday weekend.
Be Selfish: Sometimes, being selfish is critical. And if it
involves your health and your continued recovery, make the choices that you
need to support them. If it means not going at all, or just dropping by to say
hello, know that you are the most important thing. Your friends and family will
still enjoy their night, no matter how bad the guilt trip is that they gave
you.
During this holiday, remember that your decisions have an
impact on your quality of life. Opt to continue making decisions that benefit
your health and those that love you most.
In Episode 3, Greg and Job Peter delve into a spoken word piece that Greg performed on the power of the present moment and the deception of the Ego! YAY!
